God Loves the Strippers Too

I’ve always loved dancing and when I began my endeavor as an exotic dancer, I was in heaven. The combination of dancing and mega bucks was indescribable. I was living my dream…until reality set in.

All the strippers I’ve ever seen on talk shows ALWAYS glamorized and glorified life as an exotic dancer. It was glamorous at first but the toll it took on the mind of a young girl who had no vices was devastating. Growing up with a strong relationship with God helped me stay grounded but didn’t protect me from the lifestyle as a stripper. I imposed rules for living on myself to keep me from becoming a statistic but my mental state was deteriorating as I experienced the strip club as a work environment.

As I watched new girls come into the game, I saw how they would gravitate toward anyone who was willing to offer guidance, even if it was all wrong. New girls were turned out in no time, resorting to alcohol, drugs and sex as norms of their newfound employment. They didn’t come into the shake dance game with an enthusiasm or love for dance but they did come with the love of money. The love of money is the root of all evil says the Bible. This is true.

Scriptures for Strippers is a compilation of scriptures I used to encourage myself through my employment at the strip club as a stripper. I understand why mothers and fathers weep and worry about their dancing daughters. Young or naïve females who enter this game should no there is no instructional guide. The club she works in or may not have an orientation. Even if it does, no club ever holds a newbie’s hand and makes sure she gets paid. The club makes sure she knows all the fees and makes sure she understands they will get their money. The clubs are in business for themselves and the girls are in charge of making their money.

Scriptures for Strippers is an instructional and inspirational guide on nurturing her spirit, keeping her mind and successfully navigating (and surviving) the strip club as an adult entertainer. This devotional reminds dancers that she “Gotta Get Prayed Up Before She Gets Paid Up.”

Scriptures for Strippers coming soon!

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Book Review: From the Block To the Boardroom

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After reading “From The Block to The Boardroom”, I am rejuvenated and refreshed. Mr. Tracey D. Syphax tells his life story in beautiful simplicity. From the tragic childhood to his troubled teenaged years, he patiently lays out the events, describing how he became a local legend on the streets of Trenton, New Jersey. Although he became a drug-addicted master street hustler and a member of the penal system, he eventually parlayed all the knowledge he learned on the block into valuable knowledge because they were the basic components he had unknowingly acquired to one day become a savvy, successful business man.

His devoted wife, Margaret, was one of the most inspiring parts of his story. Her tough love and forgiveness allowed Tracey to see the errors of his ways and enjoy a chance for redemption once he decided to change his life for the better… And never look back.

With the full support of his wife and two children, Tracey D. Syphax is the proud owner of two very successful corporations, The Syphax Groups LLC and Capitol City Contracting. He is a founding member of the Metropolitan Trenton African American Chamber of Commerce (MTAACC) and Minding Our Business (MOB). These organizations support the community by teaching about how to start and operate businesses. MOB’s focus is teaching entrepreneurship to 6th and 7th grade students in Trenton, NJ public schools.

Reading “From The Block To The Boardroom” was inspirational, motivational and will leave you asking yourself: “How can I implement ‘The Blueprint’? How far can I go?” And if Tracey’s story is any indication of the answer, the conclusion is: “The sky is the limit!”

Sayuri Smith

Spiritual Pedophilia

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Although reading self-help books and hard work can all be attributed to one’s success, many others may look outside themselves for motivation and support through mentorship. Mentorship is great because there is a person who can help guide decisions based on experience. Protegés can benefit from trial and errors of the mentor and the mentor benefits from giving back and helping the next generation.

Mentorship is a relationship where a person motivates and supports the growth in another less experienced or knowledgable person. Some people in mentorship positions take advantage of the person they are supposed to be inspiring. There are people who deem themselves gurus and attract attention, respect and sometimes reverence from others. These people love to be the source of information. They seem to have a wealth knowledge and love to hear themselves talk. When they ask someone’s opinion it is only to figure out weakness and “correct” them. Both people can grow from a mentorship unless the more experienced of the two keeps the other from growing, interferes with reaching goals or impose feelings of guilt by manipulation. Any of these situations are red flags signaling that someone may be a spiritual pedophile.

One of the best examples of spiritual pedophiles are those featured on the popular show called “American Greed”. People innocently look for a place to invest their money only toto be taken advantage of by a more financially-savvy slick character who has successfully  presented themselves to be working in their favor. The clinical term for Spiritual Pedophiles is Sociopath.
Only surrounding oneself with people who are less knowledgable about certain things is not the only red flag. People who constantly bring up embarrassing facts that create guilt or decrease self-esteem in order to gain compliance is another.

People want to respect their elders but not to their own detriment. Being older or more experienced may be the reasons they want you around. Usually if a person who is being mentored begins to speak out, disagreeing with what the elder says, it may not be well-received. Spiritual pedophiles seek to clone themselves and create an army of people who mirror their own mentalities. They enjoy telling others who they are instead of asking questions to help in any conflict or situation.Spiritual pedophiles enjoy molding, shaping and controlling others by means of conditional giving, support or love. They may make you feel like if they disapprove if your decisions, the relationship is at risk. They very seldom introduce new or innovative information because they themselves have stopped taking in any new info to consider. They usually have their own doctrines or philosophies they aim to cram into another. Spiritual pedophilia has nothing to do with sexuality. It has everything to do with taking advantage and thriving off the innocence of the unsuspecting, vulnerable and blindly eager.

The key to avoiding becoming the victim of a spiritual pedophile, you must have a positive self-image that isn’t determined by outside validation. Once you know who you are, what you stand for and/or where you’re going no one will have authority to manipulate you and make you feel like your destiny is dependent upon their approval or disapproval. Good mentors help the “mentee” by giving them information, encouragement and a safe place to rebound. There is no negative pressure, bullying or fear involved. A healthy mentorship will guide you to your goal of a better you, not a younger version of your mentor.

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Questionnaire for my Ancestors

What is it that you wanted to do but weren’t allowed to?
What can I do to honor and represent you?
How should I position my spirit when I move towards a thing I dream to achieve to soothe
financial emotional and physical heartache?
To prove that you held your piece for a good sake.
I wish to reflect your biggest wish, dream and hope.
Your genes will instruct me as I navigate the slippery slope
of womanhood and motherhood
Without being addicted to liquor or dope.
Just tell me how to cope.

How can I be the best help meet?
To keep my hands busy and the best and most effective, efficient, productive way to move my feet.
Encourage and build two important men in my life.
To be helpful and happy avoiding negativity and strife?
Let me inhale the righteous ways of your best ideas.
Guide me on how to best live.
Show me my path through the wilderness.
I want to focus on my blessings and not stress.
So please tell me
what was your biggest wish?
(Other than to be free… Besides you have that through me.)
What can I do to bless and honor your sacrifice, to bring you back to life?
I accept all your advice so I can live right.
Moving forward to the paradise
you have you imagined in your dreams
to be an honorable man or woman,
respected and redeemed.
I make a vow,
right here and now
to make you so proud,
you come down from the clouds
to embrace, engulf and surround,
protect,
effect and defend the seeds of your loins.
I will keep this vow until our spirits are joined.

Word Life

The Lessons Taught in 12 Years A Slave

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As African-Americans attempt to find their footing in contemporary society, 12 Years a Slave helps put the struggle to exist as equal citizens in perspective. This tale is about a respectable black man, Solomon, with a wife and two children. He lived very comfortably and interacted with white counterparts as equals. During this time, slavery was thriving and the source of his white counterparts’ fortunes. Solomon didn’t even seem to notice or be concerned about the lifestyle difference of the black people who were clearly enslaved around him. Solomon is soon introduced to two white men for a business opportunity. He told his wife he had a chance to make money. After doing business, they celebrated over dinner where Solomon drank some wine and became ill. He passed out and woke up in chains inside of a barren cell.

As more and more young African-American students graduate from college, many have a disconnect with the struggle and plight of average fellow young black people. They feel as if they “have done what it takes” to move up in society and cite black people’s problem of unfair treatment in the judicial system, disparities in unemployment and lack of desire for a better education as the real reasons for their low quality of life. These educated youngsters graduate and pursuit of employment in their desired “field” only to find that regardless of their educational training, employers or “masters” only hire people who can do fill these for meager pay without the likelihood of making any “problems” by thinking for themselves.

After being passed over for opportunities for employment themselves, many of these graduates find themselves standing next to the same people they once looked down upon as they both occupy unemployment lines and welfare offices.

American society hasn’t changed much in the sense that African-Americans are pigeonholed to serve the purpose of their present “master”. Although many employers say they prefer “experience” or “education” what they really are searching for is the slave personality who have been taught how to follow. If it be by educational indoctrination or any impeccable record of servitude, they will only allow a certain type of black person into their organizations. They want someone who doesn’t know they’re real value or worth complete with an eager-to-please mindset, an exceptional work ethic and ability to blindly follow the leader.

When Solomon met other black people who had been captured, he almost didn’t know how to relate to them. Once he understood his fate relied on his ability to unify with his peers, he became aware of why black unity in the attempt to positively change social or physical conditions of our community doesn’t succeed: Death and selling out (abandoning the cause for the group in exchange for securing the interests of oneself). When the black community look for leadership to construct the master plan for everyone’s escape from poverty, violence or injustice, all the great leaders die violent (often times, public) deaths. A large percentage of people who were closest to those great leaders who remain, sell out the interests of the whole for their own personal gain. They leave all the others behind to fend for themselves and as the new “leaders” are only concerned with elevating themselves to a position of power over their still-enslaved brethren.

This film was an excruciating awakening in regards to religion. The master would give sermons on Sunday to his slaves. He emphasized how they were to be humble to him because he, their “massa”, was their Lord. This scene revealed to me why so many African-Americans today reject Christianity is a religion and abandon this faith. They believe Jesus Christ is akin to the assimilation and acceptance to exist as a second class citizen. Christians were forced to embrace the fact that they couldn’t look for justice, peace or prosperity in this life. Everything they work for in this life was for the one who was authorized by God to lord over them which were their masters. The slaves were forced to embrace a character called Jesus who died for their sins and who was whipped, hated and bruised for the world’s iniquity but wouldn’t save them from receiving the same fate. It is almost like Jesus was a superhero created by slave masters to teach their slaves to idolize to make it easier to physically control.

Black people are taught to pray, be patient and “wait on the Lord” (which translates to the white man) to save them. It would be considered an “honor” to suffer as Jesus did. They were encouraged to pray to Jesus to be saved but were also discourage from taking any steps or action to save themselves. To remove themselves from this terrible existence was to wish and and look forward to death as the only honorable, feasible escape.

Today we watch the hip-hop generation embrace the culture of death as an acceptable and welcome event. Death is glorified by promoting promiscuity, gun violence and hostility towards peers. The African-American community seem to still look to death as the only route to a peaceful existence without struggle and strife. We martyr ourselves by sacrificing our hopes and dreams in order to emulate Christ. We sit back and allow injustice to happen so we can please are Lord. Our people are frustrated because we have been taught to work hard but also never expect to personally benefit from it in this life if we are to be real believers or Christians.

The reoccurring themes with black women seem to be highlighted their ability to control their environment with their bodies. One of the main characters, Patsy, was a woman who was the object of her Master’s affection not only because she was the most efficient worker but he was sexually attracted to her. His wife knew of this and openly physically abused her as well. This young slave was raped so often she had become suicidal. She was allowed to visit another plantation where there was a black mistress of the house married to a white man. This ex-slave would brag about her status as she sip tea, gloating over the fact that she now had people waiting on her hand and foot. She had once been a slave but had used her body to change her social position. With movies and other media portraying to black women a false history of having always changed their social status by becoming sexually involved with the white man (or any man for that matter) is the poison responsible for killing the black family.

The sexual encounters the young girl slave had with her master failed to save her from her hellish life.
The master regarded this young girl as his property and he aimed to do with it what he pleased. Because black people were considered chattel, there was no regard for their feelings or humanity.

The portrayal of black people as property was another reoccurring theme. This woman and her children were sold away in exchange for money so that the master could take care of his family.
Men of that time (and this) have a limited means of protecting and providing for his family outside the white, male-dominated economic society. We wonder why black men deal with anger and violent outbursts due to the legacy of the inability to effect or control certain aspects of his life. Even today, Regardless of how good a black man is, he can be harassed by the police or disqualified for economic opportunity based solely on his race.

Today like men and women seek to recover all self-respect self-esteem hope or happiness by dating outside their race. This concept is a fallacy that is running a chance to truly overcome the negative effects of slavery.

This movie proves that America wants to keep the Caucasian male betrayed as both the villain (to instill fear in his balance and the ability for him to avoid consequences for his misdeeds) and has picked door (to reinforce that any and all good done in the world will come through him). The African-Americans must fear and revere the white race our economic survival although we are the original source of their wealth. We’ll always carried the load and worked our fingers and bodies to the bone as they chipped away at our self-esteem with lies. We are told that we are no worth to society because we have no work ethic when we built this country with our own blood, sweat and tears. We are told that we depend on others to do for survival while they lived their lives being waited on hand and foot while we were busy growing and cooking food for them and their children. Today Our culture is criminalized and accused of “ghettoizing” America when white boys attempt to emulate our hip-hop artist and white girls attempt to move rhythmically while scantily clad, both making a total mockery of us. We can never accept what this movie attempts to deliver as the moral of the story: keep trusting, depending upon and expecting the white man to deliver you. The only way to achieve your dreams or have an earthly paradise is through persistent petitioning to a white person somewhere.

Just this was never served to the parties responsible for this 12 year debacle this man in doing. This movie shows that from the top from that time to this America has yet to release the unfair, subhuman attitude towards a victimized person of color. It seems as though white people hope to one day convince us reconcile with the fact that we should not to expect and accept fair, equal and just treatment in America. 12 year slave taught me that in order to propel our people far into the future we must identify the mental shackles before we can successfully secure freedom. Notions that we must “follow in order to lead”is just another way for whites to convince blacks to surrender their power to evil change. “Suffering for Christ sake” and being a good Christian is another idea they keys black people from reaching their own hands toward ingenuity and responsibility. As we keep our heads down in prayer our eyes closed to the truth we will continue to blindly enjoy the scraps thrown to us as we scavenge the bowels of society in subpar housing, schools and communities. 12 years a slave taught me to attempt to appeal to white people as if they are doing something for us instead of the other way around is the epitome of the perpetuation of false inferiority that drives the power of slavery. To appeal to, seek or beg white people for the essentials for sustaining a mentally healthy race is counterproductive and backward.

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Strip club tip 2: Bring Money and Spend it

Do bring enough money to have fun and take part in the festivities. Money makes the world go ’round and it makes the strip club fun! This place is not for just watching everyone else. When was the last time you took your kids to Chuck E. Cheese just to watch everyone else play the games, eat pizza and have fun? In this environment, it is considered stealing to watch someone without paying them. You are stealing from the paying patron and the performer.

It is courteous to tip the stage… especially if you are enjoying the show and came for the purpose of “learning a few moves” yourself. The rule of thumb is if it makes you want to clap, tip instead.(Clapping is NOT an acceptable method of payment. This is not Cirque Du Soleil). What bill can you pay with a round of applause or a plethora of compliments, anyway? These girls have bills to pay and they are entertaining you. If you ask a dancer to show you how to do a move, tip her! You have already bypassed expensive private lessons, so pay up!

Don’t go to the DJ booth to make requests without money. That is a good way to become the butt of many jokes over the microphone. Everything costs money… Tip the waitresses, too! Don’t make her want to get her tip off your plate. Like many other clubs, there is a two drink minimum. Don’t order one drink, sip it the whole two or three hours you spend in there, watching everyone else get dances. Don’t place one 10-piece wing order for a table of 5 asking for 3 different flavors.

Do plan ahead and bring enough money to take part in the festivities! Bring a minimum of $250/person. May seem like a lot but yes! That should cover drinks, food, tips, and dances. Save up. Dress up. (Leave the attitudes at home). Come out. Pay up! Have fun!

The Nose Cozy: Innovations That Save Lives

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My mother suffers from sleep apnea. She has to wear an apparatus that helps her breathe as she sleeps every night. There is a mask that coves her nose and mouth to push air into her air way. It’s called a CPap machine. This machine pumps air to to the mask and keeps her from snoring. After a month or so, she had developed an abrasion that irritated the top of her nose.

We tried a number of things hat disappointed and caused even more pain. She decided she needed to stop using the machine for a while, at least until her nose healed. I understood her frustration but was afraid she for her to fall asleep without the machine that ensured she kept breathing throughout the night. I scoured the Internet looking for a remedy to end the pain and keep her using her machine as she should.

Then I found the Nose Cozy!

This is a brand new product that allows people who are suffering from pain from their mask to enjoy instant relief. It is super simple to use, too!

“By placing the soft, cotton pillow on the bridge of the nose and placing the mask on top, my mother could use her cpap machine comfortably!”

The Nose Cozy has brought the cpap machine back into her nightly routine and made me a happy girl! Now I can sleep well knowing my mom is too. I am grateful to Nose Cozy for helping my mom reunite with the machine that helps her breathe easy at night.

If you or someone you know are suffering from the same issue, visit http://www.nosecozys.com for more information.

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